The Hardest Thing I Ever Loved To Do

Queridos Amigos y Familia,

  Every mission has its challenges. Some missionaries knock doors all day and face rejection at every turn. Some missionaries have some of that but find golden people prepared to hear the gospel. As for me? We have no shortage of people to teach, we teach lessons all the time. But these people are quick to hear a message and slow to act on it.

   We had a very good zone meeting this week with an area seventy who is latino. He helped us understand a lot more about how to teach people of the Latino culture. One of those things is that these people are very welcoming and love hearing about God and love building relationships- so they like missionaries! (normally). But he reminded us our purpose in missionaries is not just to make friends and hang out with families. We are inviting them to change their lives, and enter into saving ordinances, promises with God that they need to return to live with Him again! Many people aren't used to the idea that Christ asks things of them. So part of the answer to this dilemma is, teaching who Jesus Christ is and what kind of relationship we can have with him. There's a painting of Jesus Christ with a lamb in his arms. The area seventy took that painting and in a role play asked the investigator, what do you see in the picture? Yeah, a lot of love and a close relationship between the lamb and the Lord! Then he asked, think in your mind, what would you do to have this type of relationship with Jesus Christ? That really hit me, because that is what I want to help others do! I know we can all have a personal relationship with our Savior! Christ asks us to be "doers of the word and not hearers only" and "if ye love me keep my commandments". The doctrine of Christ is not only salvation, but to transform us into who God knows we can become! 

  Though we had some good ones, we also had difficult lessons this week. For example, one investigator who we thought was doing well suddenly told us as we tried to teach the plan of salvation that he does not believe in life after death and that Christ's teaching are just to help us be good people on the earth. He even said he doesnt believe in salvation! My companion and I poured out our hearts into our testimonies, I had tears streaming down my face as I testified I knew for myself that Jesus Christ is my Savior, and that because of him I knew that I would see my Dad again. I felt like I bore my soul to him! But he accepted none of it! He adamantly said he wasnt ready and didnt want to learn! I felt devastated inside that anyone could believe there is no hope for a better world. I testify that Jesus Christ really is our Savior! He can heal what no other can, and because of Him, each of us can have new life in more ways than one! John 11: 25-26 says: "Jesus said unto her, I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live. And whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die." ! This is so true! 

 I learn all sorts of things on my mission, like apparently I'm a lot bolder than I though I was. One guy even called me pushy on a train. I continually learn more things about myself on this mission, weaknesses that impact the work that I didn't know I had. Here's a few things I have learned though: Boldness isn't bad if you do so with sincere love for the person, not from trying to prove you're right. Love for investigators is important, but love for my companion is even more important. When I really try to be obedient I will feel motivation for the work and feel worthy to call on the Lord's help. And I can testify with all the power in the world, but the receiver must choose to accept the Spirit and the message. I can only bring it unto their hearts. And being frustrated if someone does not understand does not bring the Spirit- patience!

  Despite hardship and difficult lessons with people I love so much, I really am doing well. Thank you for all your prayers, I always need them! I am starting to feel more adjusted to missionary life and able to take on what's in front of me. Our district started reporting how many miracles we see each day, and I can say that there are many! Whether it be controlling my temper or feeling like we should visit someone and finding her husband (well, boyfriend) had left her a few days before. I am so privileged to have the opportunity to bear testimony of the truth of God that has been restored today in the Church of Jesus Christ! I really do love this work. And of course, I love you all! 

Hermana Alley 

Sorry not many pictures this week, but the mountains here in Utah are looking pretty with fall colors!